August 12, 2004 Hands across KFAB AM.

We see:
Floor manager Kevin ordinarily doesn't have a short fuse, but OB and his
suitcase full of Super Industrial Strength VIAGRA, the six scantily clad
barmaids from Dirty Sanchez, Santa Margarita Rita, her loose cannon
husband Marco, the appearance of studio hairdresser Andre, announcer
Hal Dairywimple, and our host Dr. Craig Ephriam, well, something had to
be done. Suddenly, studio hotline goes off blinking incessantly. Kevin answers.

Kevin over intercom:
Good morning, KFAB Radio, welcome to the Dr. Craig Show how may we help you?
Oh yes Dr. Ruth, he's right here. Dr. Craig, Dr. Ruth on line two.

Dr. Craig:
Oh yes, Doctor, welcome to the Knosh Pitt.

Dr. Ruth:
Love your show, Doctor. Can you put Rita's husband on the phone Doctor?

Dr. Craig:
Here he is Dr. Ruth.

Marco:
Yo! What up, Ruthie baby?

Dr. Ruth:
Listen to me Marco, you have a beautiful wife, now you take care of her.
You stay away from those horny Dirty Sanchez' barmaids, turn them over
to OB right now. Stay with Rita she is good for you.

Marco:
I promise I will, Dr. Ruth, and thank you for talking with me.

Dr. Ruth:
Dr. Craig, you have a wonderful show, I want you to keep up the good
work, and pay attention to Kevin he is good for your shtick. I don't
know if Hal's there but tell him I remember Cleveland.

Dr. Craig:
Thanks for visiting, Dr. Ruth, come back anytime, maybe as an in
studio guest. The door is always open.

Kevin:
From control booth.
Okay kids, we're out.

Produced, Written, and Directed, by NeoN D. Surfer
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES

August 10, 2004 POV Backstage Pass All Area All Access.

Hal Dairywimple:
Well, thank gawd, we're back after that nasty power outage. Yesterday was

our first experience inside our brand new studio located in the heart of

Rancho San Onofre. We see Dr. Craig ready to bring on Santa Margarita Rita

and the scantily clad hot barmaids. OB, Officer Bob, is visibly shaken by

all this, sweating profusely at all the bare skin.

Dr. Craig:
OB, can we get you a towel, you seem as though you're going to explode

any moment now?

OB:
I am, Dr. Craig, I am! Is she next?

Dr. Craig:
She can be, but let me introduce you to her hubby's co-workers at the saloon.

Kimmie, Sammie, Tabbie, Gertie, Heather, and Paulette, girls meet Officer

Bob and his candy machine.

Barmaids:
Oh, hi, Officer, we've heard a lot about you. If what they say is true we're

going to have a ball today. Right girls?

OB:
You girls gotta' be kidding. Dr. Craig, hand me that candy bowl again,

I feel I'm going to explode, and burst, all over the place.

Dr. Craig:
Okay, save it OB, here she comes now, dressed in her super short,

super high cut, Duke's of Hazard revealing cut offs for your inspection.

OB:
Jeezus, H., Dr. Craig, I'm only human. Hey, hon, come over and sit with

your Officer Bob. Is that husband of yours with you this morning? I sure

hope not, boy, have I got plans for you and me. Come up here, Rita,

and sit on my lap.

Rita:
Oh, OB, is that a revolver in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?


Rita's husband, listening to the show screeches into the station's parking lot
jumps from his SUV, heading for the door labeled, Keep Out Artists Entrance!
Billy the security guard grabs the phone, dials the security hotline. Kevin answers;
Hello, boss, Rita's old man's on his way in, better separate OB and Rita before
the you know what hits the fan.

Dr. Craig:
We've got to go to a quick commercial, gang. Be right back.


Dr. Craig hits the red panic button and they're, OFF AIR

Produced, Written, and Directed by NeoN D. Surfer
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES EP

August 9 2004 A new begining

Hal Dairywimple:
Things happen fast at KFAB. Our new inland studio is located at, and in
Rancho San Onofre. There was such a magnificent and overwhelming resonse
to Friday's "the very best of" TUBESTEAK/MALIBU show, PD, Steverino
had no choice other than relocate a tad inland, away from the dank surroundings
of San Onore's dillapadated palm fron shack to our new and posh in-house
studios. "Steve" Steverino is our Program Director, Kevin is the capable Floor
Manager, Andre is our makeover doctor, Dr. Craig is your host, I'm Hal
Dairywimple, welcome to the show. Today's guests are make over returnee,
Santa Margarita Rita, and "Officer Bob" Krupke, INS Agent from San Ysidro.
demostrating his poweess with 200 mg's of Super Perfomance Viagra.
Without further adieu, here's your host 1800Dr.Craig Ephriam with a new
chair and desk, welcome Dr. Craig, well What do you think?

Dr. Craig:
YIKES! How many milligrams, and he's booked with a makeover Queen,
Holy Toledo, Hal. Were going to a commercial, and when we come back
we'll get started with this slaughter. OFF AIR

Kevin:
Did you guys see that thimg Andre's working on in the green room, I'll tell you
right now he's got his hands full, she's got a face that'd stop a seven day clock.
He'll need a miracle to pull this off. Okay kids, b ack in... 5, 4, 3, 2, and....

Hal:
I'd like to introduce our first guest, Dr. Craig, is "Officer Bob"Krupke,
here to give us a demonstration on how megadoses of Super Performance Viagra
can enhance your performance. I, think, Dr. Craig, it's a good thing
this is radio and not live TV, so let's give a huge warm welcome to "Officer Bob".

Officer Bob:
Thank you, Hal, nice to be here.

Dr. Craig:
Wow, Officer Bob, 200 mg's of Viagra, that should really keep you busy,
The suggested dose of Viagra is 50 mg's while your Super Performance is
200 mg's, doesn't that put immemse pressure on you, not to overlook your
partner.

O.B.:
It certainly does, Dr. Craig. I just put the little suckers in a candy bowl and
gulp ém down like Jelly Bellys. I coldn't help but notice, Dr. Craig, they're
doing a full body make over backstage. What's her name, if I may ask?

Dr. Craig:
Santa Margarita Rita, Officer Bob, she's having problems coping with her
husbands co-workers who are in their very early twenties, and very hot.
As a matter of fact, several are waiting off stage to make sn appearance
when Rita walks on. Rita's husband's in his middle late forties and feels
left out.

OB:
Rita, a bunch of barmaids in their early twenties, hand me that candy bowl, Dr. Craig.

SORRY, KIDS, THE BLOG FAILED RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STORY, WE'RE OFF THE AIR. OUR APOLIGIES. OH, YEAH, TIME EXPIRED. HAW!





















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