December 17, 2004 Mission accomplished!

Nodd and Twinkie brought along this link. Enjoy!

http://www.leucadiasurfschool.com/DORA_LETTERS.html

Written by Golly Dimples.
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES

December 16, 2004 They're on the way!

Nodd and Twinkie will arrive at Old 'Nofre Friday night for their
long awaited return to what Nodd considers his home break.
Although they're not married, they consider themselves common-law.
Twinky is the spitten'image of juror #7 a.k.a. "Pinky". Nodd and Twinky
are here for Gatekeeper Donn and Janitor Larson's annual Christmass
Buffet. Rangers Dairywimple and Ephriam are co-hosting the event

Written by Fausto Rellano.
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES

December 15, 2004 USA invasion.

I wish I could remember when Old 'Nofre was a real surfboard riding beach,
but I don't think I'll ever have that pleasure, I have Alltimer's disease. No matter.
Parks and Recreation Dept. eradicated the Golden Bear Annual Pass for the
elderly in order to have enough money to pay for immigrants who slip into
the USA unnoticed. The moment they arrive they make a bee-line to the
Mexican Cosulate looking for assistance in filling out welfare forms, free
medical assistance forms, Women, Infants, and Children [WIC], free legal
aid, food vouchers, free transportation passes to day labor camps in Redondo
Beach, Capistrano Beach, Laguna Beach, and San Clemente across from
Washington Mutual. It appears they've heard of Bush's "Gana la Verde", free
green card. Once they're here, they'll stay like a mother-in-law.

Written by Jorge Enchilada
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES

December 13, 2004 Bienvenidos Amigos

During summer of '43, USA sailors walked out of the Orpheum Theatre
on So. Broadway with their dates, and were accosted by several pachucos
wielding 2X4s in front of the show. One red haired, freckle face gob took
offense when the zoot suited cabron called the date a wisa. One of the pachuco
vatos snuck behind the gob, swung the 2X4, knocking the gob to the pavement.
The vatos took off across Broadway, looking for more servicemen. By now the
gob was joined by other sailors, jumped onto the Pacific Electric streetcar to
Terminal Island. The gobs told other sailors of their plight, and were joined by
75 carloads driving north on American Ave. looking for for pachucos on
Broadway. Well, they spotted them hammerin some Marines in front of the
Million Dollar Threatre a few blocks north of the Orpheum. To make a long
story short, the gobs jumped out of the cars and proceeded to kick tke living
schitt out of the vatos. But they didn't learn, they're still there and more coming in.

Written by El Pachuco
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES

December 12, 2005 SOSC BOD, it didn't work.

Hah, hah, hah. Well Mr. San Onofre Surf Club, your treacherous
lies about California Bear Pass duesn't mean Jack Schitt, because
we found out a better way into Old 'Nofre. Yep, it's real simple,
any moron can do it. Drive south on the Interstate until
you arrive at Dairy Blvd. in San Ysidro, pull into "Dirty" Sanchez's
Border Town Mexican American Insurance Shoppe. For $35.00,
gringo, you can obtain an International Driver's License and the
coveted Metricular Consular card, when shown ai the 'Nofre kiosk,
you will be waved through at no charge. When the Metricular decal
is displayed on the windshield your car will not be broken into. Although,
it's not a Golden Bear Pass, it gives you full access to the surf beach, all
available toilett facilites, and State Newsletter.

Written by Terry Beard.
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES