YIKES! Another sensless death at Beach Nofre.
Yesterday, Joe "BLOGGER" Manfredo collapsed
and died on the infamous "primitive dirt road".
Joe was walking from Bldg. #4 lugging his 9'10"
tri-fin lomgboard down to Dogpatch for his
afternoon surf, when he dropped to one knee,
then tipped over. A fisherman walking with
his catch, took it all in but to no avail, it
seemed Manfredo was dead by the time
he hit the dirt road. Sammi the Fisherman
said nothing could've saved Joe, he was just
too old. How old? Joe was 49, lived in Mission
Pendejo, 5'8", 280 lbs. True, he should not of tried
his luck with the Old Nofre mushburgers, but he
heard a poem by Canoest, Ron Drummond, claiming
he would ride till he died. Joe Manfredo didn't
make it. Sal Gee said, what difference did it make
if Joe's time was up. Sal held the SOSC and its
BOD harmless for both deaths. Incidentally, there
were three heart attacks at Doheny State Beach
yesterday. All victims survived. Sal said, maybe
we should pave the road, and save some lives.
HAW! That'll be the day. Iknow it'll frost SOSC
BOD, but shut down the beach , no more deaths.

Written by Joe Coronary.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

The San Onofre Beach Council said , "No mas"
to the sensless deaths of unsuspecting heart
attack victims. Sal Gee said place those
"counfounded defibrulators" right beside the
"Take a doggie pooper blue bag" so, like a fire
alarm break glass to use, the defibrulators would
be available instead off in the bed of a Toyota
pick up on the way home to a beach Council
Member's duplex to have the amps tested while
a middle age man lay dying in the middle of the
old San Onofre dirt road. What should
happen, Nora Squatt, Ernies widow should
sue the living you know what out of Sal Gee,
the BOD, and 10 John Does for negligence,
then watch your Club dues soar. Yesterday
alone, there were four heart attack victims,
all survived because of the alertness of Doheny
State Park their paved road, EMT's , defibrulators
on vehicle, not to a BOD's duplex for
an amp check. Gee, I hope SOSC BOD moves
ahead to the 21st Century before any more
deaths occur on the beach, especially to a
middle age guy who wanted to surf till he died,
and had his dream fulfilled.
"CLEAR!".

Written by Larry Coronary.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES