Funny you should ask. The answer is yes there
will be a Tubesteak Entourage departing for
Malibu Suturday for Surfer's Healing festivities
to be held ar the World renown "PIT" directly
in front of the "Dora Lives" graffitti emblazoned
on the infamous wall. There will be many notables
from the Surfing World, including SANO's own
the big kook. Proceedings commence at 10:00 A.M..
There will be no charge to accompany Tubesteak
to the pier. He does request you refrain from calling
it the trendy, 'da Bu.

Written by Johnny Fain.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES ESQ.

Now, hey. If any of you hard-core skepics think
you can out-fox the State's Mandate about no
booze on San Onofre Surfrider, you'd better
think twice. Now listen up, and listen up good.
There will be an exhibition today at Bldg. #4,
showcasing the alcohol sensitive attack dogs.
The State is adamant about no booze of any
kind on Surfrider Beach. Ranger Hackworth
will be there at 4:00 P.M. illustrating how they
will dry that beach up. How dry you ask, well
drier than the Gobi Desert, that's how dry.

Written by I.M.Parched.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Oh dear, this ain't what San Onofre wants to hear.
July 1 2007 your beach is no longer a sanctuary for
alcoholics. The regulars are figuring how the system
can be beat. No way, Tokay. The State has recruited
several alcohol sniffing attack dogs. The dog sniffs
booze, you will be held at bay by their well trained
handlers. I don't know why boozers feel it's okay
to chug-a-lug in the motor home. Get this, and
get it right. No alcohol at 'Ol 'Nofre means no
alcohol at San Onofre. Period! End of report!
The State has been training weeks to overcome
the onslaught of alcoholics, who've been told,
"No problema, bro, we tried to get through majijuana
for sick people, maybe they'll let us slide." No way, Santa
Fe. Go look for work, before you die of liver disease.
The message is out, if you come out of the ocean after
a great sesh, don't think you're going to mellow
with a chilled Heinie. You try, you go straight to Vista
Jail. You don't pass go, you don't collect $200.00.

Written by Paris Hilton.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES