There's nothing worse than running out
of things to print. Yep, we're flat out of gas,
nothing to write, it's gonna' be the same
manana. We're not gonna' do no more
overflow bypass line schtick, gasoline
on it's way up to a record $5.49 a gallon,
no more incessant toll-road prattle, traffic
to San Diego and back is history. They
don't need no toll-road that nobody uses..
So what's the big deal McNeal. Why should
I waste my time fretting over some road that's
not going to happen. How long they been
fighting the damn thing. All it is is somethig to
get your pea-brain off the airport.which will
be the Greatest Park. See you in the funny
papers. San Clemente's a dead horse town,
there's no use beating it to death. Right? Right!

Written by Hot-horse Harry.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

During our trip down south, we ran across
quite a spot San Onofre Cling Wraps would
love. South of Del Mar there's a Hippie
Heaven where old guys with thinning gray
hair swept back in a pony-tail sit in their love
circle talking of powerful Maui Wowie and
the abundance of newly harvested hash-hish,
the "Free Love" place is Goomu Reef. Man,
it is so cool you'd wonder why all those guys
wouild hang out at SANO'S logs when they
could be hanging here live and in color (LSD).
If there is a problem here SANO guys have
discovered the place. Well, no rest for the wicked.
Here comes a hippie now with his multi color
parrot on his shoulder squawking, "Polly wants
a cracker," in Spanish. I toll you this place is
so smooth.

Written by Tommy Tunes.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

I think maybe San Onofre Surf Beach
has run out of attractions, like who
wants to sit in an agonizing, slow
moving line, only to be seen on a dying,
desolate, dusty, boiling hot, road that leads
nowhere. So then, let's take our act down
to beautful Solana Beach, just past
Leaucadia, Cardiff, and a neighbor of
our Sister City, Vista. Solano Beach is
heaquarters for beautiful stone gatherings,
Las Ola's crisp tacos, Chart House's Restaraunt,
and unlike Beach San Onofre, cool, clear water.
There's a beautiful "no dogs on beach"
law second to none. A nifty newly asphalted
road with white parking stripes, it too,
second to non. You park directly waterfront,
and of course, it's all free. Yep, there's no
$135.00 Annual fee, no $15.00 a day parking.
If you love your day at the beach, Solano is
the beach for you. Del Mar Horse Track
is right up the road. One more important
thing, if you love "La Siesta, you'll adore
Juanita's in Encinitas. All the subcontractors
hang out there letting their dog bark like
hell in the bed of their Ford 350. So you
won't feel out of place, there's a wonderful
spot just like the "RIB" with all types of seedy
characters called "Captain Keno's", sorta
like the Red Fox Lounge, catering to
fifty year olds with no where to go.

Wtitten by Wayne Mumbry.
BUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

I think the only way VF'S "LOST BOYS
OF MALIBU" would've played longer
was if the magazine had ran the piece
as "LOST BOYS OF SAN ONOFRE",
then she would've run till the SOSC
BOD elections. It's hard for the Club
to concentrate on anything outside
of No. San Diego County. See, there
was no bocci-ball side-bar to capture
Club members interest, no volleyball
highlights, no overpriced Club Luau
tickets, no obscene clowns. No wonder it
ran only a month. Instead of Gidget
and the Kahuna, I'm not positive
who they might've used Danny and Ranger
Pam. well, I'm saving all my money for the
Club's updated Annual. It's almost as....
pricey as Grannies new book.

Written by Dr. Bookworm.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES