Febuary 4, 2005 The speech of speeches.

George W. Bush delivered a "State of the Union" address Wednesday,
showing what a great and powerful leader he is. Bush now has all
A-Rabs shaking in their boots. Female women unveiled, coiffered in
$500.00 dews, sweet perfumes, perfectly manicured fingernails,
were stunning, sitting in the clean and sober, "Hi, my name is Laura...."
box, high above the speaker's floor. President glossed over his
guest worker amnesty program because he knows with "Beto"
Gunzalez and Carlos "Charley" Gonzalez, his father's dream of
"Now we're begining to look like America, the melting pot for
which we were intended." Good for Bush Senior. I wish everyone
had the compassion the Bushes that do. God bless you, Dubyah!
This is for the concerned surfers of Old' Noftre, the only way you'll
drasticaly cut the legal invasion of the USA is pray Bush's best buddy,
Vincente Fox is not re-elcted and the PRI reclaims Mexico. Because
if not they will swam America like the proverbial locust.

Written by Jose Lopez Portillo y Pecheco PRI
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Febuary 3, 2995 Same schitt, different day.

While watching Bush's Dog and Pony Show last evening, well
I couldn't believe my poor little eyes. His promo was guest worker with
an amnesty provision, camera zooms to The First Lady ( looking like
whatever happened to Peggy Sue) flanked by what appeared to be
two nannies, but was I misled, they were two Iraqi broads, sans veil and
Bedouin costumes, who voted the other day, sent to the USA sporting
$500.00 hairdos from Mr. Jason of Manhattan, waving a blue index
finger thrust in the air, all paid for by our government as a public
relation stunt by Bush's regime. Just as I thought I couldn't believe
my poor little eyes, the camera goes to the parents of the dead Marine
killed in Bush's war against terror. The parents were forced to embrace
the Iraqi voter, weeping and sobbing, as if it spontaneous. Then, get
this, Bush wants the parents to hand over the dead Marine's dog tags
to the broad from Iraq. Please Mr. Bush, cut us a break.

Written by Saddam bin Laden.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Febuary 1, 2005 Invitations in the mail.

Lord knows, I really lucked out. Walked to the community mail center
where my Super Bowl Party invite at 'Dogpatch"was waiting, and boy is it
going to be a doozie. Thick 'n meaty spareribs, onion rings, corn on the cob,
salad with huge chunks of avacados, fajitas, corn tortillas, gallons of
ice cold Macaladas, char broiled bratwurst, Grey Poupon mustard,
Bloody Marys, pepperoni chunks, Gallo hard salami, Grey Goose
Vodka, Big Scoop Fritos for guacamole, Cerveza Superior, oysters on
the half shell, pastrami sandwiches, and if you ain't there then you're
square. I'll be looking for you, so be on time.

Written by Barbara Boxer.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

January 31, 2005 It don't look no good for us!

After =Dubya's= overwhelming victory in Iraqi elections, you will notice
the floodgates opened, tens of thousands of non-gringos pouring in to our
country, looking for $15.00 per hour jobs and abeyance citizenships.
"El Padre Patron", BIGKOOK showed up this morning in a U-HAUL
RENT ME ONLY $19.95 van packed with migrant farmworkers looking for jobs
gringos won't do. He drove all the way down to Chula Vista's Costco for
more guestworkers, all sporting "Ärriba Bush" campaign buttons with
one noticeable change: they were red, white, and green not red, white,
and blue. Bush's amnesty workers are at 'Nofre installong rock stairs
that people won't have tha intolerable wait in the by-pass line.

Written by J."Manny"Alvarez
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

January 30, 2005 Bienvenidos amigos.

THEBIGKOOK'S guestworkers were impressed with Old 'Nofre
they didn't want to return home, so BK gave them the Key to the
City and, like a mother-in-law, they're here to stay. Today, at Bldg.#4,
they're making tortillas and menudo for the beach. It's a good thing
they can't read because there a petition to sign denying driver's
license and welfare payments to undocumenteds and their reletives.
The irony of the thing is the guestworkers call BK El Padre.

Written by Juniperro Serra.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES