Several years back, I worked as a "surfboard wrangler" in a Volkswagon
Golf spot at Newport and Balboa Pier's parking lot. The Production
Company was the same as the one filming the Izzy Paskowitz Story.
If you were there, you know what was involved i.e., 1st, 2nd, 3rd
A.D.'S ASC, 1stloader, 2nd loader, 3rd loader, 4th loader [MARK IT],
Transportation Capt. Best Boy, Gaffer, Dolly Grip, Dolly Grip Best Boy,
Asst. to the Producer, Script Girl, Wardrobe MAster,V.O., O.C.Talent
Boom Operator, 1st boom operator, 2nd boom operator, Foley Operator,
ADR Director, Properties, well, the whole tab, according to my friend at RSA Prductions was $3,700,000,00, not bad for a day at the beach. I guess you
bocci-ballers are gonna hang at the Öld 'Nofre, well, you can KMMFA, I'm going
to Hollywood and make some good money!

Written by Swifty Lazar
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Now the Action starts for next week's "OPEN CASTING CALL".
BREAKDOWN calls for "ALL TYPES" with a CALIFORNIA ATTITUDE,
BLOND HAIR, A BEACH SWAGGER, POSSESS GOOD VOLLEYBALL SKILLS.
LOTTSA TEETH, AND BEACH SAVVY. The production # is 1324,
WORKING TILE, "SAN ONOFRE LEGENDS AND IT'S CHARACTERS".
Talent will report to TECHNICAL DIRECTORR SAM CONROY or
ASSISTANTT T.D., AL GEE. Bring your SAG card for I.D.
The catering truck will furnishcomplementaryy "Continental
Breakfast". Sorry, no IATSE applications taken on beach.
Courtesy to CSA Agencies.

Written by Enrique Espanjosa Gomez.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

No matter how hard the SOSC BOD tried to handcuff the progress of
Surfing, well, it was a feeble attempt on their part. A maverick
dissenter at SANODAISEY featured several staged photographs
of Dailey Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, and La Opinion,
discarded newspapers indicating Hollywood types and migrant
mexicano day laborers were the core of production leftovers
after the "Shoot" yesterday. History tells us Old 'Nofre was
the location of Warner Bros. and Republic Studios WW II
propagandaa movies. The real break in Surfing History was
the 1959 release of the breakout movie Colombia's runaway
hit "GIDGET" starring Miki Dora II, Sandra Dee, Cliff
Robertson, and Mickey Munoz, himself, in a Cameo spot.
Movie "GIDGET" did more to promote Surfing than any other
film in history. Yesterday was the day of real time Surfing,
grip trucks, camera trucks, catering trucks, clacker-boards,
sound trucks, just like the "Early Days". It echoed up the
beach: "Quiet everyone, we're filming, "AND ACTION".

Written by Gabriel Upton.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES.

U-U-R-R-R-P! BELCH! DELICIOUS!

Written by Pedro "Sodomizer" Lopez
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Congratulations Gringos, as of midnight a la punta, you
have become Mexicanos Afficianados courtesy your wonderful
President Jorge Bush in his ongoing campaign to appease
his Tio Vincente Fox, il Presidente. Warren Harding was
the worst President of this USA, that is until =W= became
Commander in Chief. Think it over: where was =W= 9/11/01,
you guessed it, tucked away safe in his brother Jeb's FL.
Now then, how far is Washington DC from Miami? Along ways.
Osama bin Laden sent a message to us juxtaposing 9/11 for
emergency. Why else would =W= be out of harm's way reading to
non Ingles speaking Cubanos. Heck, the California/Mexico border
is worse than Iraq, but "Loophole"Bush doesn't want to offend
Fox. =W= can't make as much money on offshore drilling cause he'll
get the environmentalists angry with him. With =W=, who needs the
US Senate.

Written by Hector Horatio Salcedo.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

Something appeared different at Old "Nofre yesterday.
Here it is Sunday, no line, no traffic jam at Haw'n
Gardens, and only a handful of timid bocci-ballers,
you know, the die hard regulars. I'll tell you one thing,
in the day at Malibu, they'd of kicked any, and all, shiny
aluminum ball toten'guy's ass of the beach. What doesn't set
too good is they all walk around with their obligatory
cocktail Surf Club trendy mug. So here's the poop, it seems
the SOSC BOD has been called on the carpet, and read the riot
act. A comprehensive survey was taken randomly in the waiting
line upstairs. The biggest complaints were the members were
condescending against, to many cliques, dogs and kids. Cheeze,
can you imagine Malibu in early years, when the boys hit the
beach, and some guys showed at "The Pit" wanting to know if
anyone wanted to play booci or, get this, cherry-pit spitting
contest. Christ, Malibu guys are "broad jumping", "breast-stroking",
"shot-putting", and somebody wants to lug shiny balls around
the beach. I don't think so!

Written by Armando Sanchez de Morro.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES