July 27 2004  Don't get mad Get even.

Bro' Dude, acting under advisement from his rabbi, Cy Greenbaum, filed

an indictment against the SOSC BOD, State of California, San Onofre

Ranger Headquarters, Regional Supervisor Otto Schnabel, Superintendent

Dairywimple, Ranger Ephriam, and ten John Does, Charges range from

excessive brutality, mental anguish, shame and embarrassment, and

unnamed charges to be filed at a later date. Total liability against all defendants

$15,000,000.00. The BOD assembles this Saturday and they ain't gonna'

believe it, 15 extra large.  Right off the top it's going to  cost $200,000

for representation and the Club has only $175,000 on hand. This may

be a good bone to chew on for them. Brodman Duder a.k.a. "Dude Bro'"

apparently has taken aboard THEBIGKOOK as friend, colleague, and

financial advisor when the 15 large is awarded. Bro' has retained

D.Denial Shapiro as lead counsel. Mr.Shapiro has never lost a civil

case in his gilded career. Now the good news. The BOD meeting will

take place this Saturday at 9:00 AM sharp for the "Jim Irwin

Memorial Bocci-Ball Center" dedication in the vacated latrines at Bldg. #4.

Following the ceremony the entire BOD, Club members, Rangers and

families, are invited to Cowabunga Ice Cream Parlor on Del Mar

for the book signing featuring Kathy  "Buy My Book" Kohner.

Ms Gidget will sell 500 signed copies of the book that started it all.

Buy a book and get your name mentioned on the public address

system by JT. At dusk on Ol'  'Nofre's world famous surf beach,

Jim Irwin will announce nominations for the most popular surfer

in the Club from the past 10 years.  Wait a minute: 500 signed

copies at $10.00 each is $5,000.00 for three hours work. YIKES!

Well, San Onofre ain't no Malibu.

Produced and Directed by NeoN D. Surfer
TUBESTEAK/FLABBERGASTED