Saturday, May 21, 2005

In the early day, surfing used to be a man' sport, but sorrowfully
it has been gone to the dogs, bocci-ballers, real old guys eho
love it because water's soft unlike basketball courts, and
volleyball where, in summer, the sand gets hotter than a whore's
ass. Can you picture Dr.Barney, Eddie McBide, Hammerhead, standing
tall in their Uggs, jawboning how much better outer reef'l be
when the tide goes out. "More coffee please." I sure wish Senator
Luton was here, he'd schitt brique, sideways. There seems to
be a sea of naivete at Old "Nofre this early in the season. Please
old guys, 'Nofre is a great beach for the inexperienced, the weak,
the unsure even Ron Drummond couldn't stand the place. When
Viking said "This place hasn'tý seen a curl in fifty years," he
wasn't kidding. The reason people are japped around by
Dairywiinple and the State is, 'Nofre regulars can't ride
nothing but high tide mushballs. I'll bet dollars to donuts
Eddie wouldn't go there, nosiree Bob.

Written by Rick Heil.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES

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posted by Huevos Rancheros @ 5:41 AM   24 Comments

24 Comments:

At 2:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dust Mites in the Home

Dust mites are tiny bugs that live in your home. They measure about 1/100th of an inch in length, which is smaller than the period at the end of this sentence. Dust mites feed off of pet and human dander (dust), and their waste is a major cause of allergies and asthma. In children who have asthma, dust mites can cause them to wheeze more and need more asthma medicine. So, cutting down the number of dust mites in the home is an important step if your child has allergies or asthma.

Dust mites love warm, humid areas filled with dust. Bed pillows, mattresses, carpets and furniture are great places for them to live. Cleaning each one of these places can make a real difference in the number of dust mites in your home.
What do I do first?

Start in the bedroom. Most of the dust mites in your house live in your mattress. Put an airtight plastic or polyurethane cover over your mattress. Wash your sheets and blankets in very hot water every week. Wash your pillow every week or put a plastic cover on it. (The pillowcase goes over the plastic cover.)

The water used to wash your sheets and blankets should be 130°F. This temperature is higher than you may want for your water heater, because water over 120°F can burn children if they turn on the hot water by themselves. If you don’t want to set your water heater at this temperature, you can wash your sheets and blankets at commercial laundries.

Your bedroom should have a hardwood, tile or linoleum floor instead of carpet. Dust mites can grow rapidly in carpet. If you must use carpet, try not to place it on concrete because the warm space between a rug and concrete is a good place for mites to live.
I don't want to rip out my carpet. Is there anything I can do to treat it?

You can spray the rug with a solution of 3% tannic acid every 2 months to make the dust mite waste less bothersome. However, tannic acid itself can be irritating and it can't help as much as removing the carpet. If your doctor tells you to use this solution, he or she can tell you how to get it and apply it.
What else can I do?

Vacuuming your carpets and upholstery every week can help. Vacuums with high-efficiency filters pick up more dust mites, but even standard vacuums work well enough. Plastic or wood furniture that doesn't have much padding can also help keep down the number of dust mites in your home. Because dust mites love warm, humid places, keeping the humidity low by using a dehumidifier and running your air conditioner makes a difference. Special air filters can help reduce dust mites in the air.

 
At 2:04 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Hotter than a whore house on dollar day."

 
At 2:05 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know what burns my ass? A flame about three feet high.

 
At 2:06 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Hotter than a snake's ass in a Wheel Rut"

 
At 2:13 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I wouldn't have it up my ass, if I had room for a sawmill"

 
At 2:16 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than two rabbits screwin’ in a wool sock

 
At 2:17 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hotter than a June bride in a featherbed

 
At 2:18 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than a popcorn fart

 
At 2:19 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than a Times Square Rolex

 
At 2:20 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than Hesperus

 
At 2:20 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than a norn toad in a microwave

 
At 2:21 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hotter than the starter pistol at the quadroplegics' decathlon

 
At 2:22 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh,

How hot was it?

 
At 2:28 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

HOTTER THEN HELL

 
At 6:04 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Vacuum boy, you are wire reyond your years. I always thought it jock iych infecting me and I've been fighting it with Preperation H. Thanks again VB.

 
At 9:02 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

would someone mind telling me what the heck these comments have to do with the price of tea in shina?

 
At 9:08 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone listened to the " Jackie Gleason Orchestra" lately?
wow, great stuff.
a * VERY * good article about him
and some great drinking stories
www.moderndrunkardmagazine.com

 
At 9:44 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh yea, check out the
"comics for alcoholics"

 
At 3:01 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

HOTTER THAN A TEEN AGED WHORE HOUSE
IN SAGION

JEFFREY DONG NGUYEN JR.

 
At 4:59 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

s scary as the innocuously spin-titled USA Patriot Act is, with its broad powers of search, seizure and intrusiveness, there's a proposal under consideration in the U.S. Senate that makes it look positively libertarian in its current form.

The new bill doesn't have a mom-and-apple-pie-sounding name yet, probably because the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence that's crafting it would rather the American people not know about it at all before it gets folded into the Patriot Act. The first glance the public will get at it will be at a hearing this week. Following that bit of pro forma business, the committee's Republican leadership will hold a closed-door markup session and then send it to the Senate floor for a vote.

The broad powers the proposal would allow are both frightening and unconstitutional.

Unconstitutional? Yes — if the Fourth Amendment is one of the things you hold dear as an American. That is the clause that guarantees "the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures." The Amendment states that this right "shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized."

Do you like those protections? Didn't we fight a War of Independence to gain that right, along with a few other freedoms? Well, you can kiss it all goodbye if the Senate gets its way.

Open season will be declared on your health and library records, tax documents and other personal data. These materials could be subpoenaed without a judge's approval. Based on the disdain Congress and the Bush administration have previously shown for the Fourth Amendment, that shouldn't be a problem. After all, the USA Patriot Act already allows law enforcement officials the right to trample the Constitution in criminal cases; why not abrogate the obstructionist thing entirely?

You may be sure that Congress and the administration will carefully explain to us how these unconstitutional outrages are necessary to ensure national security, and that they are merely protecting us from terrorism. Frankly, we would prefer some protection from our "protectors." That is the shield the U.S. Constitution was meant to provide — but that shield is corroding rapidly under the acid being splashed upon it by the executive and legislative branches of our government.

 
At 10:42 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, I've figured out who everyone Tubesteak talks about by codename except Dairywiinple.

Who that?

 
At 3:53 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know who "Dairywimple" is.

I'll tellyou if youtell me who "nosiree Bob" is.

 
At 6:54 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

PROGRAMS GET YOUR PROGRAMS!

 
At 6:29 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

2 foot longs down here, and a coke

 

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