September 5, 2004 CONTEST CENTRAL

There sure was a lot of Email last night regarding "chips" and little girly
heats being sent in the water at 7:00 AM contest day. The old guys claim
their heats are always dispatched in the afternoon, when the ocean's choppiest.
Children are terrified not knowing the difference between glass and chop.
They have a point. Sixty-five year old guys have trouble catching waves in
extremely agitated water. You can take it to the bank, boogies, girlies "chips
off the old block" will get plenty of glass time early AM. Older judge's eyes fail
late in the afternoon looking in the bright sun all day with no shade furnished.
The girlies and little "chips" won't go out far so it's easy for the adjudicators to
judge them. The contest higher ups, however, don't want to upset the children's
moms so they're not going to rock the proverbial boat. It was discussed behind
closed BOD doors, if you complain enough they'll allow cry-baby heats. Great
move for Bulky-Tee Shirt sales with plenty of XXL's in stock. The club should net
over $10,500.00 in sales. Which brings to mind, there's an alternative to
the good old stand-by 50th Anniversary shirts, the mystery guest will have
bundles of glossy 8X10's on hand for souvenir hunters."The McDonalds Sky
Box" arrives Friday PM for the Celebrity Gathering [I/O].

Written by Sam Conroy.
BRUCE SAVAGE AND ASSOCIATES