Somebody snitched on the band. Tonight's concert is in danger.
These poor,old,non-union Öld 'Nofre "jug and gut bucket"ensemblee
has been called onthror "carpet" by James C, Petrillo IV for non
payment of Local #23Musicianss union dues.Rangerr Dairywimple
explained these Old Timers thought, because of their old old age
they were exempt from dues paying. Union B.A. said "no soap" while
slapping a nonperformancec injuction on Legendaryspokesmanm, E.J.Oshier.
Ranger Ephriam pleadedwithh the B.A., saying these old ex-surfers
reside at Whispering Chimes Assisted Living Compound adjacent to our
medical center, average age 97.5, with minimum fixed incomes, barely
enough for cashews and salt-water taffy, let alone any remaining for
their Goldenn Bear Pass, with gas pushing $4.99 a gallon, it just
doesn't leave anything for union dues. Ned Hokie,103 years feels this
is his last year down at 'Nofre before he's laid to rest, which is not good considering the State has put a limit on the tradional "paddle-outs" per year.

Written by "Old Harry" [103]
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES