DATELINE SAN ONOFRE 6/8/2004 REUETERS NEWS SERVICE
GIANT BEAST WASHES ASHORE AT OLD MAN'S LAST EVENING.
A gruesome, foul smelling, corpse washed ashore in front
of Haw'n Garden's Four Doors, causing confusion among the
loose running farm dogs. The Forensic Coroner is unable
to trace the origin or the identity. Ranger Ephriam is in
charge of deposition of it's remains. Dairywimple suggested
it washed south from the boundaries of Richard Henry Dana Boat Sanctuary West Basin. Because of this unforeseen event the
"paddle-out" for the "Kamakazi Kid" is postponed indefinitely. Unfortunately, the "San Clemente Junior Lifeguard Award Ceremonies" is now on the back-burner until Ranger solves the case. If you are a member of the "Old Timer's" Wednesday
night "Sam Conroy Bamboo Room Lounge", call this number:
949.555.0074 for re-booking.
TUBESTEAK/SHAMUS