.

Too many emails yesterday complaining about treatment
of animals, actually dogs allowed to roam loose at Beach
San Onofre. San Onofre took great pride broadcasting
whereabouts of the Kahoona from North of Laguna's
Stammerhead and his pooch Corky. Way back when
dogs were forbidden on the beach from Malibu to
Hermosa. They have a hideous "Bark Park" over on
Clown Valley Parkway by Deidrich's Coffee and Sal's
Pizza. Folks actually take dogs and sing Happy Birthday
songs and open rubber balls chew on fake leather rawhide
bones. Guess what the most popular dog's name is, yep, you
guessed it "Gidget". Have you noticed while at your beach,
owners always look the other direction when their beast
squirts a huge bowel evacuation. That's why so many of us
environmentalism will never return to San Onofre Doggie
Beach again. Best of all, a 6th generation dog owner came home
to Old 'Nofre last week, sat on the log beneath the Fingermill
eating a horsecock sandwich made with white Langendorf
Bread and Miracle Whip Salad Dressing, crammed it in his
mouth, laid on his back as the animal licked the food from his
Master's mouth. YUCK!

Written by Al Latrine.
BRUCE SAVAGE SAND ASSOCIATES